it’s almost May, which means every single wine article written for the next several weeks must only be about pink wine. I don’t mind this, because I like pink wine very much. For this year’s annual pink wine article, I’d like to dispel several myths.
- Pink wine is unmasculine. This is incorrect. In addition to being an excellent pairing for grilled sausage, roast pork, or even filet mignon. Now a Saison beer on the other hand is girlier than the State of Arkansas.
- Pink wine is only good in hot weather. Bullshit. Pink wine is good year-round and, much like President Obama, is an ideal substitute for either a robust white wine or a lighter-bodied red wine.
- Pink wine is a blend of white wine and red wine. No. Although there is so-called “blush” wine that is actually made from the blending of white and red wine, these wines are terrible. A pink wine is made the same way as a red wine, except that the grape skins (where the color comes from) are left in contact with the colorless juice for a shorter period of time.
- The best pink wine comes from France. Wrong. The best pink wine comes from your mom. Whether or not she is French does not factor into it.
- Pink wine was invented in 1937 by Hieronymous P. Sobel in what was then Upper Volta. That is incorrect. Although Dr. Sobel moved to Upper Volta in 1931, by the time of his invention of pink wine, the area where he was living was being administered by Niger.
And that’s it! For a more detailed take on the origins of French wine, you should read this article by some jerk I barely know.
The Satellite Show 
Does it count if I add a bit of pink colouring to my white wine?